From the moment I came out, I knew I’d get people who didn’t understand. I knew that there’d be transphobic people out there. It’s just how society works and discrimination is something everybody has to deal with regardless of race, gender, height, weight or any other societal (or non-societal for that matter) convention.

I don’t care if you “don’t agree with it.” I don’t care if you “think it’s wrong.” I care about simple decency, respect and a basic understanding of science. You choosing not to agree with transgenderism is entirely down to your own morals and your own beliefs and that’s perfectly okay. But the moment you discriminate against somebody or belittle somebody and use those morals and beliefs as reasoning for it… that’s where it turns to shit. It’s not that difficult to say “I don’t understand it, I may not agree with it, but you’re a human being and I respect you”… is it? You don’t have to understand something to accept its existence. Personally, I don’t understand Einstein’s Theory of Relativity however I know it’s a thing… so why is Gender Dysphoria so different?

You see, not a lot of people actually educate themselves on the topic before putting across their points. And unfortunately, the transgender community is getting a name for itself of being filled with butthurt pre-teens who use being transgender as a fashion statement… so whenever someone asks a legitimate question to educate themselves they get shut down because ‘you don’t ask a trans person that, it’s so offensive omg.’ That is why I always tell people “I don’t speak for the trans community, and the trans community doesn’t speak for me.”

Allow me to give you all the complete rundown of being transgender. ‘Transgender’ is the term for someone who has a medical condition called Gender Dysphoria. Yes, you heard me. A medical condition – one that’s recognised by the Royal College of Psychiatrists and treated by the National Health Service. Whether it’s a Mental Health condition or a Sexual Health condition is still being debated – there’s not been enough research done to concretely suggest that it is or is not a mental illness, or whether it is or is not a sexual health condition. Time and research will tell. But what we do know is that it’s basically where the brain has been hard-wired to correspond with the opposite gender than the one biologically present. Brain evaluations of transgender individuals show that FTMs (female-to-males) have male neuron numbers in the BSTc and MTFS (male to females) have female numbers. So in that sense, being transgender is not a choice and has a perfectly valid place in science.

Gender Dysphoria creates a lot of self-hatred of one’s own body (I use the term ‘self-hatred’ specifically, as it surpasses general insecurity.) It’s a hate of one’s every physical aspect – from hair (or lack of it), to voice, chest, figure, height, genitalia… everything. This disconnect between what’s in your brain and what’s biologically present may lead transgender individuals to be susceptible to mental health issues – namely Depression, Anxiety Disorders, and Eating Disorders (among others, however those three are most predominant as a direct cause of Gender Dysphoria.) If a transgender person does not receive the treatment they require in order to be happy with themselves, it can lead to suicide – statistics gathered by the Williams Institute show that 4.6% of the overall American population have self-reported a suicide attempt… between 10-20% of those respondents were gay, lesbian or bisexual, and 41% were transgender or “gender non-conforming.”

Names and pronouns are a bit of a funny one. You can argue all you want that ‘I’ll call her she if she was born a she’ or ‘she was called Bertha at birth so I’ll call her Bertha’… but what you’ll find is you’ll end up in the situation a small minority of my friends, family and family friends are in now. I’m on testosterone, so my appearance and voice is changing and within the next year I’ll start getting a beard, and it’s getting to the point where these certain family members are starting to get funny looks in the street when  they’re calling me ‘she’ because I don’t necessarily  resemble a female anymore. Just bear that in mind for future – you may just be the one looking a bit daft. (I’d just like to point out to those referring to me as ‘she’ as a way of insulting me – it doesn’t insult/ offend me. Yeah, it may make me feel a little bit uncomfortable, but it doesn’t resonate with me… I don’t go home and dwell on it. It takes a lot to offend this tranny, so you’re gonna have to try harder xo)

I just wanted to make this post to set a few things straight. To cut out the whole ‘this could offend trans people’ bullshit, and to say it as it is. Gender Dysphoria is a real medical condition, and no amount of people saying that us trannies are freaks is going to change that. (side note… I know some people don’t like the word ‘tranny’ and it personally offends them, but this is a personal blog for my personal views and personally I f*****g OWN the word tranny.)

Peace out.




  1. Hey Elliot,
    I just wanted to say as a fellow Trans man I 100% agree with what you wrote and why you wrote it. It really is each to their own and since coming out I have had surprisingly more support and encouragement from all the strangest of places and people.

    Our own minds create the worse ideals for us and actually I have had one woman say she doesn’t understand it but she respects and likes me for me. And that was cool no offence taken.. I don’t expect everyone to be accepting because I am. But I like to show respect and be respected..

    All my work are making the effort to say he, and see going into the new year as as new me.. It’s really great when people try to actually make a effort because you are right a beard and a deep voice defiantly makes people wonder about being a she haha

    I really hope your family In time use male pro nouns and respect all your wishes lol. Your a great guy and I’m enjoying your blog! Feel free read mine and have a catch up whenever.

    I don’t mind transman, tranny or transsexual just as long as it’s not said in a spiteful way and I never get mad when people say she because it takes time.. I’m very open and honest about my transition and look forward to seeing yours as I haven’t even begun mine yet.. Have a merry Xmas and happy new year Nicholas


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